Your life. Your choice.

I don't know what it has been lately that has made me think of how comparisons can drag a person down. What is great about being an individual is the birth given right to make choices. The choices you make shouldn't be based off of others ideas of how your life should be. Make choices that make you happy!  Even if others don't agree with those choices alway remember your right to decide. 

If the way you live your life makes you happy then the thoughts and interjections of others shouldn't have any effect on your life. 

Live happy and live long and always remember your life is yours to live no matter how different it is from others around you. Be true to yourself now and always. 

Love at first sight? I don't think so....

Growing up in a Mexican American family I was shaped by both my Mexican culture and my American culture.  Growing up with a father who migrated to the United States and built a business on his very own back taught me from a very early age that hard work is more important, and if you want to get anywhere in life you have to put in the time and make choices that facilitate you getting to your end goal.  My mother also worked full time but always had the house clean, laundry washed, food in the kitchen and dinner on the table. She also taught us that although it is tiring you can be a full time working mother and still take care of your family.  My family did not hug or say “I love you” on the regular but we knew it all the same.  The hard work my parents put into their full time jobs and the dedication they put into helping others was their way of showing us love not only of family but love for human beings in general.  I feel that this allowed my brother and me to truly identify
within ourselves the ability to be independent and hard working.
 So with hard working parents and my father very much the greatest advocate for education I was always taught that my education came first! It came before friends, television, boys and fun.  Of course growing up I always saw this as a horrible way of life.  I made the complaints that every child makes when they are told no when asking to spend the night at a friend’s house or playing outside after dinner.  What I have come to learn as an adult is this greatly prepared me for the road my life would take.  With that being said, I must now begin the fun story of how my dad always told me I would not be allowed to date until I graduated college.
 I remember the conversation to this day! We never really talked about boys or boyfriends and I don’t think my parents ever had the desire to but one day when I was a freshman in high school my dad randomly said I wouldn’t be allowed to date until I graduated college and that I needed to get my education and have a degree so I can support myself and not rely on a man.  Now this may seem odd to some who do have the assumption that all women, especially Mexican women are raised to be wife's and mothers. This is not always the case (especially I'm my case).
Well I didn't necessarily take my dad's word and abide by it. I dated off and on after high school but never found someone who I felt should be introduced to my parents. My mom being the amazing mom she is would listen to my experiences but my dad never heard or knew anything other than my life as a college student. Now don't think this was my way of rebelling or pulling a cover over my dad's eyes because it was not that. I have way too much respect for my dad to introduce him to "boys" that we're not worthy of meeting the main man in my life.

Fast forward a bit to 2012, I was just reminded how immature men can be, even older men and decided it was time to just take a break from all dating and I decided to delete my POF (plenty of fish) profile (yeah I did the online dating thing). I had been on the dating website for a couple years and never really had success (not surprisingly) but the night I decided to delete my profile I saw a message from a man whose profile picture caught my attention. Now it wasn't his face that caught my attention it was actually the face of the woman who was in the picture with him. So I decided to open the message and that is how I met the man I love.
His profile picture turned out to be of him and his mom and I am so glad he chose that picture. It is not everyday a person on an online dating site chooses to use a picture like that as a first impression (ladies don’t lie you know looks are important). So we exchanged messages for a while then texts and finally we had our first date. I knew on that first date I had met someone special. He was kind and polite. He had great conversational skills (a big plus) and be showed interest in what I was saying.  I won't say it was love at first sight because I do not believe in that but what I can say is I knew from that first date he was going to be someone special to me. We had our second date two days later and a month after our first date he was the first man to ever ask me to be his "girlfriend". 

It has been a whirlwind of emotion and happiness this past year and I couldn't ask for a better person to share my time with. What is ironic in this entire situation is the fact that I didn't meet James until my second to last semester in college so I pretty much followed my dad's rule (to a point).  I had a full time job which I had been working for over seven years and I was just about to achieve a Bachelors Degree in Child Development.  I had been taking care of myself for many years by this point and never had to rely on a man for anything.  James is the only man I've felt was good enough to meet my parents so he has and they love him too. He has taught me that the person who loves you isn't afraid to show it and isn't afraid for other people to know how in love you are. He tells me every day that he loves me and shows me that I am just as important to him as he is to me.  He has also taught me that even though I can take care of myself and don’t need another person to provide
for me it is okay to need someone’s love.  

So if you were to ask me if I believe in love at first sight I would say no.  I believe in attraction at first sight but it takes more than that initial encounter to truly identify if you love someone.  Love is too great an emotion and too intertwined with your soul to be figured out in one instance or attraction but if you were to ask me if I believe in true love and there is someone out there for everyone the answer would be Hell YES!!

C